Summer Lovin :)

WAHOO, IT'S SUMMER!!! So we homeschool all year long but we're really laid back about it, especially during summer months. I'm so excited about everything that goes with summer...bbq's, camping, 4th of July, picnics, beach days, hiking...adventure!!! I have a mission this summer, that I'm hoping will become such a normal part of life that I do it all year long. My mission is to do at least one fun project or activity everyday this summer with my kiddos. I'm going to try to take pictures during each special event but as you know, sometimes you can't take the camera with you. Yesterday we had a BBQ at a local lake but it was so windy at first that right after we ate, we loaded our stuff up so it wouldn't blow away and then went over to the water, where the kids splashed and played for awhile. It amazes me that no matter how windy or cold it is, kids don't care, they'll jump right in and play around! I love it!

So far this past week we've had a picnic at one of the elementary schools with a friend of ours and her kiddos, where the kids got to ride around on bikes, eat our picnic lunch and play on the playground for 3 hours.



**FYI, mom wasn't using her brain properly and neglected to administer sunscreen on herself (she did however get the toddler covered) and dear ol' brainiac mom has a RAGING sunburn on her back, shoulders, arms and shins that hurts even 3 days later! Yes...lesson learned! LOL

We had a fun lunch of english muffin pizzas one afternoon, where Keegan got to pick what toppings he wanted and make his own pizza. He loved being in charge! :)


We just bought a new tent that fits our family a whole lot better. It's like 18x10 and can fit both of our queen sized air mattresses, Tatym's playpen and still have plenty of room for our stuff. My hubby, who happens to be the world's BEST dad (and husband), was itching to set the tent up to check it out so it's been up in our backyard now for like 4 days so the kids have been having a blast playing in it. Hubby even had a campout with Keegan the night before last. I love our new tent!


It's been raining a lot here lately so one day this past week, I took the kiddos on a puddle jumping walk! We walked around the neighborhood on the hunt for massive puddles which we found some great ones! I couldn't take the camera along for obvious reasons! LOL Tatym was soaked from head-to-toe by the time we got done and Keegan was soaked up to his waist! It was a blast and definitely something we'll do a lot more now that Tatym is getting older...but hopefully it won't rain like that very much this summer! *Wishful thinking!*

We went on a walk around the neighborhood on a sunny day. We walked down to my grandparents house to check on our garden and then we stopped at the park and played for a little while.

Have I mentioned how much I love being a mom?! I feel so blessed to be able to stay at home with my kiddos! It's the best "job" I could ever hope for and I'm cherishing the time I have with them!! <3>

25 Ideas to Romance Your Man

Another goody in the book Becoming the Woman of His Dreams by Sharon Janyes is a list about 25 Ways to Romance Your Man...here you go:

1. Put a chocolate kiss in his briefcase.
2. Draw a candlelight bath and invite him to join you.
3. Surprise him in the shower.
4. Warm up his towel in the dryer.
5. Warm up his socks in the microwave.
6. Greet him when he comes out of the shower with a warm towel and a steaming cup of coffee.
7. Watch the sunset together.
8. Eat by candlelight.
9. Take ballroom dance classes.
10. Spray a mist of perfume on his pillow.
11. Place an "I love you" sign in a public place.
12. Write him a love letter.
13. Write him a poem.
14. Write an acrostic of reasons you adore, admire, and appreciate him A-Z.
15. Have a special song.
16. Fax a love note to him at the office.
17. Send him a romantic e-mail.
18. Leave an "I love you" message on his voice mail.
19. Kidnap him for an overnight getaway. (Pick him up at the office. Have his overnight bag packed and kids stowed atay at a friend's.)
20. Celebrate your first date, first kiss, and the day he asked you to marry him.
21. Write him a thank-you note for something specific he did for you.
22. Make a video of your life together using old photographs and your favorite songs.
23. Make a list of 25 reasons why you adore him.
24. Give him a trophy for "Best _____." Trophy shops will engrave anything you like.
25. Give him a full-body massage, telling him what you like about each body part as you move along.

Now aim to do something like this at least once a week, if not once a day for your husband!! It won't hurt, I promise! :) Have fun!!!

My Marriage Testimony

Ok, so I know that the Lord allows us to go through trials and tribulations and testing to build us and help us to become stronger and wiser and to also share what we've gone through to help others through their struggles and to give them hope. What I'm about to share has lots of parts that I am not proud of at all and sadly brings some embarrassment to my husband. He & I have talked about it and although he isn't thrilled with me sharing it, he realizes that it's my testimony and that what I have been through has been used to help friends of mine and may touch other women that might come across this blog. It's pretty long but I'll try to shorten it where I can! LOL

Here we go :)

My hubby (Josh) and I met when I was 17 and he was 19. We worked together and were just friends. He was living with his girlfriend at the time and their son. I had no interest in dating him but it was fun to flirt. Well, about a year later we bumped into each other and we were both single then so we started dating. We dated for about a year before we moved in together. There wasn't a whole lot of drama with the ex and son prior to us moving in together but there was some. At one point she tried to break us up but after the truth came out we worked through it. After we moved in together it got a lot harder. We had lots of issues and I had a hard time being in the "stepmom" role. After about a year I couldn't handle it anymore so we broke up. We went our seperate ways for a little while but I had developed pictures that were of him and his son so I called to make arrangements to give them to him. A girl answered his phone and I hung up. Later I found out from Josh that he was seeing someone and she had moved in and it was a shock to me. It had only been like a month since we'd broken up so long story short, it sparked some jealousy so I started to pursue him again. His son's mom had moved on and was finally dating someone so she wasn't as intrusive in hubby's life anymore and that was the biggest perk. Hubby very quickly asked his current girlfriend to move out and we started "seeing" each other again. Blah, blah, blah...we ended up pregnant with our son, Keegan. It was a HUGE shock, definitely not planned. I freaked out and thought my life was over. After that initial shock, I fell in love with the idea of being a mom but you know, I was only 21, wasn't really in a serious relationship with Josh so of course at first I was confused and worried. Anyways, we moved right back in together and he proposed but I was still unsure of whether I wanted to be with him or not. As horrible as it sounds, I felt like I had to marry him because we had a kid together. We got married right after Keegan's 1st birthday. Even after getting married I was still half in and half out of the marriage. There was always drama with my stepson and his mom and life was a nightmare. Sure we had our good times and I did love Josh but I always felt like the grass was greener on the other side. Anytime we'd fight I'd threaten to move out or something but felt trapped because I was a stay-at-home mom and didn't want to be a single parent trying to work full time and share custody. Eventually though, I got saved and totally gave my life to the Lord. I went through drastic changes and that brought on different struggles in our marriage. Josh went to church with me for awhile but then said he wouldn't go anymore because he felt like a hypocrit. I went for awhile by myself but there was always that inner battle of wanting to stay home with my hubby but wanting to go to church. After about 2 years I started drifting away from the Lord. I still loved the Lord and tried to be good but I quit going to church and started listening to secular music and eventually started talking to an old guy friend from high school on myspace. It started out innocently, I had absolutely no intention of anything going beyond a friendship but after a few weeks of emailing, chatting online and a few phone calls I started having feelings for this person. I was unhappy with my life with my hubby and to his defense, he was a very good husband but we were still trying to figure out how to deal with his ex and his other son and dealing with completely different spiritual views and a bunch of other stuff. The world tells us to do what feels good, to have fun, to live for ourselves, etc. and I started falling for it. I wasn't happy and dang it, I needed to do something for myself and blah blah blah. I asked for a seperation. For the record, that guy I was talking to was living in Alaska so I never actually dated him or whatever. But I felt like if I was having feelings for someone else then it wasn't fair to hubby or I. I moved out and got my own place. I was working full time, started going to bars with friends again, started seeing someone from work, started smoking again and the whole time I just felt lost. I had gone from being a young, carefree girl to becoming a mother and wife and felt like I had lost myself along the way. So when I left Josh I reverted back to the girl I was before I got married because I didn't know what else to do or how to be me. I knew what I was doing was so wrong. I didn't go to church, I didn't pray, it was so bad that I wouldn't return phone calls to my dear friend Deena because I knew she would quote scripture to me. I was never alone in the quiet. If I was at home I always had the tv or radio on because I could hear the Lord trying to talk to me, trying to tell me that I wasn't doing what He wanted me to do. I would fall asleep watching tv because I couldn't handle the quiet, couldn't handle hearing what God was telling me. I was having fun, I didn't want to deal with my stepson and his mom and I didn't want to deal with having to work at my marriage. The media (tv, movies, music, etc.) tries to make us think that a perfect marriage is one that doesn't take work, one that if full of rainbows and butterflies and constant mushy gushy stuff and that wasn't my marriage. Maybe I married the wrong person. Well, after about a month hubby started talking to a girl and that freaked me out again so I said I wanted to get back together. I worried that if I waited too long to figure out what I wanted then he would have moved on and wouldn't want me back and that freaked me out. I moved back home and we went to counselling for awhile but the lady wasn't a christian counselor and seemed to not really do any good. After a few sessions we quit going. Things seemed like they were fine, we got back into the routine of life and eventually started trying to get pregnant. Well, I got pregnant but lost the baby after about 8 weeks. I was devastated but knew that the Lord had a plan and was in control so although I was sad, I knew the baby was in His arms and that's a far better place then here on earth! I started thinking again that I didn't want to be with hubby anymore and that led to me leaving again. We sold our house and both moved into seperate apartments. This time I chose not to date or talk to anyone. I knew there was something wrong with me and I needed to be alone and try to figure it out. I didn't go to bars, I didn't drink but I started smoking again. After awhile I noticed that on my days off I was spending all my time with hubby and Keegan. We'd hang out at either his place or my place or we'd all go out to eat or whatever. After awhile I broke down crying and asked how he could be my best friend but how I could feel so unhappy in our marriage. We decided to start dating again and gave it a month before we moved back in together. I knew he was who the Lord wanted me to be with. I started reading every christian book I could get my hands on about being a wife, about being a stepmom, about marriage in general, about being married to an unbeliever and I started going to church again. I read scripture after scripture about God's purpose and plan for marriage, about how a wife is to behave and treat her husband. I read Jon Coursin's teaching about dating and marriage and about how we might have married #875 on God's list of husbands for us but the instant we said "I do", that man just became #1 on God's list! Not only did I read all that, I took a long hard look at my husband. This man had been put through HELL by me and yet he still loved me and accepted me. I hurt him more than anyone has ever hurt him but he forgave me and continued to work with me to make our marriage happy for both of us. He worked on some things with the way he deals with his ex and son to help me be more happy and I fell deeper and more in love with him then I had ever been. Divorce is no longer even a possibility for me. Josh is my husband until death and I am 100% committed to him and to our family. I adore him so much. So all that stuff I went through and all that I put Josh through, yes, it totally sucked and I wish it hadn't happened but you know what, the Lord used my horrible mistakes for something truly amazing! My marriage is more than I ever could have hoped for. When I hear of women leaving their husbands it breaks my heart! If they only knew how truly amazing their marriages could be if they'd put the Lord at the center and not focus on their own selfish feelings and if they'd quit listening to the world. I've been there and thought my marriage was completely done and I see it now and I'm totally in awe and on my knees thanking the Lord for saving me from making probably the biggest mistake of my life! Our marriage is not perfect, we still have issues with the ex and my stepson but instead of battling with each other, we're getting better about dealing with it as a team and not letting it upset our relationship. It's been 3 years since our seperations and we both realize that for our marriage to be happy it takes work from both of us. We're still learning how to communicate and I'm doing a lot of reading and studying about what God says about my role as a wife. I'm so thankful that He's given us the Bible as an instruction guide on life. It has all the answers THANK GOODNESS! LOL So yeah, hopefully I told the story well enough. Sorry it was long and hopefully it wasn't too choppy.

A big thank you to my amazingly fabulous husband! I know it's not easy having me share what we went through but if it helps even one marriage then it's so worth it! I love you babe, thank you for loving me way more than I ever deserved! I hope to spend the rest of my life making it up to you and showing you just how much I love and adore you!

25 Ways To Show Respect To Your Hubby

As I've mentioned before, I'm reading Becoming The Woman of His Dreams. I couldn't sleep tonight (yikes, it's 2:30am and I have to teach childrens' church at 10am) so I got up to spend some much needed time with the Lord. Once I finished my devotional I got back to reading in this book. At the end of the section about showing respect to our husbands the author had this list of 25 ways to show respect and I thought I'd share it on my blog! I'm still learning about how to show respect so this was quickly copied into my notebook and I'm even toying with the idea of framing it! LOL Anyways, here it is:

1. Don't talk down to him.
2. Don't talk badly about him to others.
3. Don't check behind him to make sure he did something to your standards.
4. Don't disregard his wishes.
5. Don't ignore his requests.
6. Don't laugh at his mistakes.
7. Don't make him the brunt of your jokes.
8. Don't compare him to other men.
9. Don't complain about your finances or his ability as a provider.
10. Don't speak sarcastically or with verbal jabs.
11. Don't roll your eyes when he makes a comment you don't agree with.
12. Don't continually "have a better idea."
13. Talk to him in a pleasant tone.
14. Speak highly or compliment him in front of others.
15. Allow him to do tasks his own way and then thank him when he is finished.
16. Value his opinions.
17. Support his decisions.
18. Try to fulfill his requests.
19. Thank him for providing for your family.
20. Allow him to make final decisions.
21. Support him in his decisions, regardless of the outcome.
22. Avoid the words, "I told you so."
23. Take care of your appearance.
24. Ask his opinion about your clothes and hairstyle.
25. Tell him you are proud of him.

My heart is sad...Marriages!!

I don't even know how to start this, I'm just so sad! It seems like almost on a daily basis I'm hearing about marriages just being torn apart, people seperating and just giving up. It's so frustrating because as a person that has been there and knowing what the Lord showed me and all that I've learned about God's view on marriage, ways to have a happy marriage, etc. and just seeing people being selfish and prideful or thinking the grass is greener on the other side. I just want to shake them and tell them that they are making a huge mistake!



In our homeschool co-op the moms are reading Becoming The Woman of His Dreams and I had brought the book to work with me the other night and that sparked a conversation with one of my co-workers. She asked me if they made books like that for husbands because she said her husband really needed it. I said that I was sure there were books like that out there. We got to talking about how in God's Word, wives are commanded to respect their husbands. This means even if they don't "deserve" it and probably especially when we don't feel like giving or showing respect. You could tell this really bugged my co-worker and she made a remark about not giving respect if her husband wasn't going to treat her right! That's the part that frustrates me. Now don't get me wrong, I am FAR FAR FAR from the good and respectful wife that I long to be BUT I'm constantly working on it. I grew up basically with a single mother that had been abused by previous husbands and even her current husband and she was very open about telling my sisters and I never to rely on a man to support us, never to need anything from a man and I was never shown how to show/give respect to man. I'm learning as I'm going along in my own marriage and it's tough! I honestly had to look up in the dictionary what respect was. I mean I knew that you were supposed to show some kind of politeness to people in higher positions or elderly but I didn't know exactly what respect was. For those that are curious, here's what I found. I took out the stuff that didn't fit what I was looking for and this is what was left that helped me:


RESPECT =
*esteem for or a sense of the worth or excellence of a person, a personal quality or ability, or something considered as a manifestation of a personal quality or ability

*deference to a right, privilege, privileged position, or someone or something considered to have certain rights or privileges; proper acceptance or courtesy; acknowledgment

*a formal expression or gesture of greeting, esteem, or friendship

*to hold in esteem or honor

*to refrain from intruding upon or interfering with



In Ephesians 5:33 it says:

However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.



In the Amplified bible, this is what Ephesians 5:33 says:

However, let each man of you [without exception] love his wife as [being in a sense] his very own self; and let the wife see that she respects and reverences her husband [that she notices him, regards him, honors him, prefers him, venerates, and esteems him; and that she defers to him, praises him, and loves and admires him exceedingly].

That was a huge eye-opener for me and I'm really working on doing all of those things but sadly, I fail more than I succeed! But at least I'm trying! I'm not digging my heels in and saying that I'm not going to do those things unless hubby does these things! It totally goes along with the Love & Respect seminars (they have a book and workbook too along with DVD's of the seminar...I HIGHLY recommend that every couple do this at least once a year)! The whole cycle of a woman feeling unloved so she reacts with disrespect, the husband feels disrespect so he reacts unlovingly and on and on and on! It takes a mature person to step back and say WHOA, we're not going to do this anymore! It takes work to have a happy marriage and it makes me soooooo sad that the world is telling us that we need to do what makes us feel good, what makes us happy and if something isn't making us happy then we should just drop it and seek out those things that do make us happy! We get so caught up in the sugary sweet goosebumps, butterflies in the stomach, etc. that we get when we first start dating someone and when the newness is gone and we don't have all the "warm fuzzies" then we go out seeking it in other places! Hello people, isn't there something awesome about growing old with someone and knowing that person is going to be by your side through thick and thin and no one will know you better than your spouse and on and on?

I'll have to save my marriage testimony for the next blog posting because it's long and I have to make sure that my hubby will be ok with me sharing it. I was making HUGE mistakes and heading the wrong way but I just praise and thank the Lord that He not only pulled my head out of my selfish butt, but He gave Josh a forgiving heart! The biggest reason I want to share my marriage story is to give people hope! I was at my wits end and was so done that I was ready to sign divorce papers and walk away. I want people to know that life is sooooo much better if you can just stick it out and WORK AT IT instead of giving up! My marriage is so much richer and more wonderful now then I ever could have imagined! The Lord will bless you for trying and for sticking it out! Life isn't always going to be rainbows and butterflies and your spouse is probably the one person on earth that can really push your buttons and get on your nerves but please know that divorce is never the answer (unless abuse is involved), marriages can be repaired!

Here are some things that helped me:

Jon Coursin's study on marriage

The Bible (of course)

Love & Respect by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs

The movie Fireproof is great too!

A Woman After God's Own Heart by Elizabeth George

A Wife After God's Own Heart by Elizabeth George

Created To Be His Help Meet by Debi Pearl

The 5 Love Languages by Dr. Gary Chapman

Love Dare book

Those are just some to name a few! LOL I'm telling you, please, please, please don't give up on your marriage! You can never regret putting your all into saving your marriage!

To be continued...

I love my husband!

For those that don't know, I'm a homeschooling mom. My son, Keegan is just about to turn 7 years old and I've been homeschooling him since he was around 3 years old and I love it...most of the time! LOL We're involved in a christian homeschool co-op that meets 3 Fridays a month and has field trips the last week of the month. The great thing about the co-op is that not only do our kids get a chance to take "classes" with other kids from christian homes, us moms get a chance to visit and learn too! An amazing lady named Rebeca leads a Moms Encouragement Class for the moms that are interested in it. This semester we're reading a book called: Becoming the Woman of His Dreams by Sharon Jaynes. I haven't been able to read much of it because of how busy life has been but I did read the first part of it and I listen to Rebeca talk about sections in the book and it's just awesome! I've really been feeling the Lord pushing me to keep learning and growing in my job as a mom & wife and this study has just really helped me to stop and think about how I react to things and how I treat my husband! I feel like I've hit the spouse jackpot and married the most amazing man in the entire world. Josh is loving, caring, funny, handsome, a great father, patient, even-tempered, selfless, compassionate, adoring....I could go on and on! He's not perfect but let me tell you, he's pretty darn close in my book! Sure, there's things he does that bug me and I don't agree with the way he handles some situations in our lives but I adore that man more than he could ever know! Now, I feel like my poor husband didn't even come close to hitting the spouse jackpot! I'm so not the great spouse that he is to me and that breaks my heart! I want to be that loving, doting wife that never nags, never overreacts, is patient and kind and is always smitten with my husband but I'm sooooo not!!! I'm quick to critisize, ungrateful at times, easily annoyed/stressed...on and on! The crazy thing is that even though I'm like that, Josh really makes me feel like he adores me! WHAT?!?! It's nuts! The Lord really, really, really blessed me with such a great husband! I'm hoping that since the kids & I are going to take it easy today that I'll get a chance to read some of the book. My personal goal is to do something nice for my hubby everyday and really keep pushing myself to work on being a better wife! I want Josh to be able to feel as lucky and blessed and spoiled as I do!!!